We’ve all been there: last night was immaculate vibes. But today? Your body’s a noodle and your brain is scrolling through every text you sent like it’s conducting a congressional hearing.

Here’s your 5-step recovery plan for when the post-party fog hits harder than expected:

Step 1: Hydrate Like You Mean It

Water is cool, but have you tried being hydration dramatic? Think: oversized Stanley cup, cucumber slices, maybe a metal straw. Bonus points for saying “I’m detoxing” out loud.

Step 2: Nourish the Temple (AKA Eat Like a Gremlin)

Now is not the time for a sad salad. You need carbs. Maybe a bagel the size of your face. Something warm, melty, and ideally delivered.

Not in the mood for anything heavy? Go for comfort snacks: buttered toast, peanut butter on a spoon, or the most healing food of all—leftover pizza. Eating isn't just about refueling; it's about grounding yourself and reminding your body you're safe. Bonus points if your meal is consumed while wearing fuzzy socks and watching something with zero emotional stakes (hello, Great British Bake Off).

Step 3: Move... Gently

We’re not suggesting hot yoga. We're talking: a walk to the corner store, stretching on the floor like a cat, or just opening a window and letting your body remember sunlight.

Step 4: Rituals That Reboot the Soul

Light a candle. Mist your face. Cuddle your emotional support pillow. Maybe take a microdose of something calming from Turnt Up to smooth out the static. Play a lo-fi playlist called "gently returning to life."

Step 5: Accept That You’re Not the Worst

The hangxiety lies. Your friends aren’t mad. Your texts weren’t weird. You are, in fact, a delight. And even if you were a little chaotic? Own it. You’re the fun friend.

Recovery is a vibe. Romanticize it. You earned this soft reboot.